Creepy Inner Child

Bruce Wayne takes a young lady to the bedroom...

• Girl: Mr Wayne... How about we get these constricting clothes off.
• Bruce: I was about to suggest the same thing, young lady.
• Girl: Mmm... What a fine... Wait...
• Bruce: What...?
• Girl: ... All those scars... What the fuck?
• Bruce: Oh, it's just...
• Girl: What the fuck!?
• Bruce: I play polo, that's all. It's rather a dangerous sport. Don't worry. Now...
• Girl: Wow, wow... Polo? I'm not an idiot. Oh, god... You...
• Bruce: I... What?
• Girl: Oh, for fuck's sake. You're fucking Batman, aren't you.
• Bruce: Haha! What? I... No!
• Girl: You fucking are. You're the fucking Batman.
• Bruce: Honestly, no... I just...
• Girl: What, polo? I'm not a total moron. Some of those... Jesus... A lot of those look like bullet holes. Yeah, polo?
• Bruce: I... No, it's...
• Girl: And that scratch one... Catwoman, I take it?
• Bruce: It's...
• Girl: Jesus Christ. How did you not think I would realise? And what the fuck is that... it looks like someone tried to take a fucking bite out of you.
• Bruce: I... Uhh...
• Girl: It all makes sense... Extremely wealthy. Childhood trauma. Returned to Gotham after ten years, and immediately we first see Batman. How the fuck do people not realise this all the time? And... Of course... Every time you adopt a new kid, we see a new Robin. What the fuck, Bruce... I mean... Okay, I'm not the brightest cookie, but, like... The cops and villains and shit... If anyone actually wanted to find out who you were, it's actually pretty fucking obvious, isn't it. I mean, Jesus... Richest guy in Gotham with a motivation for vengeance... Who the fucking hell else could it be? I can't believe you're Batman. I can't believe it...
• Bruce: Okay, fine... Yeah, yeah... Now are we fucking or what?
• Girl: Are you kidding!? You're batman. Get those fucking pants off... And please, do the voice for me.

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